You Can Get Killed For Just Living In Your American Skin - The Oarsman

I can attest that the quintessential American Childhood is idyllic. You are, of course, spoon-fed patriotism from the moment you open your mouth, but when you are 7 years old, your world is one to be proud of. This land is your land, and it is our land– from the redwood forests to the gulfstream waters, to the climbing trees outside of school, and the tire swing at the park. You recite the Pledge of Allegiance every morning.

We were proud Americans growing up. My mother bought me picture books of Ruth Bader Ginsburg and Shirley Chisholm. It was drilled into my head what a privilege it was to be educated, to have the freedom to learn: Be proud.

Then I got older, and the star-spangled blindfold fell away.

On January 8th, in Minneapolis, Minnesota, Renee Nicole Good was killed by ICE agent Johnathan Ross. The last few months have been so constantly tumultuous that news rarely fazes me anymore (as horrifying as that is). Still, for myself and many others, this particular death was a shock.

As historian Robyn D. G Kelley phrased it, “She was a white woman and a mother—two things you’re not supposed to be when armed agents of the state put you in a body bag.” The reported accounts of ICE detaining, arresting, and deporting legal citizens, residents, and innocent families oppose the flimsy argument that they are acting in the name of national security and safety. The murder of a legal observer (an American citizen, a non-violent observer) exemplifies that point.

The officers surround her car, and she reverses, turning the wheel away. The camera turns to a bright blue sky as gunshots sound.

Two weeks later, Alex Pretti was maced, restrained, and shot while observing an *ICE raid *on a local business. Pretti had been carrying a handgun (which he was licensed to own) at the time of his death, which remained holstered throughout the entire altercation (as bystander footage attests, despite federal statements).

He was holding a cellphone. The federal government defends the point that both Good and Pretti were killed in self-defense.

For many, they were the antithesis to their perception of what a victim of police brutality was supposed to look like. There is something to be said about the fact that it took the death of two white people for many across the nation to come to terms with the corruption of the current administration and of the systems that have subjugated black and brown individuals for decades.

*You can get killed just for living in your American skin, *sings Bruce Springsteen on the 2001 single *American Skin (41 Shots), *released after the murder of Amadou Diallo at the hands of a group of NYC police officers. Diallo carried only a wallet, though the officers claimed they shot out of fear that Diallo was drawing a gun. One of them would go on to win Sergeant of the Year.

In 2020, George Floyd was murdered by Derek Chauvin (not a mile from where Renee Good would die 6 years later). I recently went back and rewatched the footage.

Floyd is detained over accusations of circulating counterfeit money. I can’t breathe, I can’t breathe. He is handcuffed and pulled through the backseat of the cop car. I can’t breathe Ican’t#ingbreathe. *He falls to the ground and Chauvin kneels against his neck. Floyd calls out for his mother. *I can’t breathe I’m about todie . Please don’t kill me. After 8 minutes and 25 seconds, he is unconscious

The history of law enforcement using the argument of “self-defense” to justify the use of lethal force (particularly against black and brown individuals) runs deep within this nation. There are too many names to count- the Duluth Lynchings, the murders of Adam Toledo and Sonya Massey, Keith Porter Jr., who was shot outside his residence in Northridge, California by Brian Palacious (an off-duty ICE agent) on New Years’ Eve, and Geraldo Lunas Campos, who asphyxiated after being restrained by multiple guards in ICE custody after a suicide attempt.

In 2025, 31 individuals died in ICE custody– many *due to medical neglect. *Many had resided in the United States for decades before their arrest.

They died living in their American skin.

Time and time again, we watch armed law enforcement play judge, jury, and executioner to unarmed civilians. I find it impossible to distill a cumulative takeaway from the last few months. These are terrifying, dangerous times, and the fabric of our country is under attack– but the people are speaking out.

From California to the New York islands, in the deep south, the midwest, in high schools, and in signs posted in the windows of the shops that remained shuttered on January 30th, you see the American spirit.

This is what my mother refers to when she says she is proud to be an American; she is proud of the people and their resilience. There is privilege in that statement– it is easy for a white, middle-class, straight, cisgender, liberal in a blue city in a blue state to feel this way.

*On Learning to Dissect Fetal Pigs *is the only poem Renee Nicole Good ever wrote available online. I stumbled upon it while doomscrolling through news articles the day after her death.

There are times when it is impossible to separate the art from the artist and the context it was created. I do not know the context in which this poem was written, but I know the context in which I read it. There is something painfully ironic about the fact that this poem, about human life and our delicate origins, has only attained mainstream recognition because its creator is no longer with us. []